I can't explain how truly incredible it is to love and be loved by such an amazing man. I am truly blessed. You spend your whole life wondering what your guy is going to look like and act like and sound like, and then one day you meet him- and it is such a surprise to find that it was no surprise that he is exactly what you need, and that you have no doubt he's the one for you.
Enough of talking in second person.
I am in love with an incredible man. He is funny and smart and sweet and attractive and warm... But none of those things really do him justice. He's just...awesome. And I can't believe he's mine. I can't believe that I snagged such a genuinely awesome guy with a genuinely warm and well-meaning and trustworthy heart. He makes me feel secure and stable and safe. I am not afraid of him, except to let him down. I want to be the best for him- the woman he has dreamed of and the wife God needs me to be for him.
I can't wait to start a new life with him. I can't wait to see him every day and hug him every day and be his friend through every step of life- through every bad day at work and through every sunny day outside. I can't wait to be his bride. I can't wait to do life with him. I can't wait to serve him and show him companionship and grace.
I feel like I have been looking for you for a very long time. I can't say enough how much I love you. I can't stress enough how blessed I feel to be marrying you in 96 days. You're my guy... I knew it all along, and you did too. I have prayed for you for so many years...prayed that you knew the Lord, prayed that you would show up in my life soon... You make me feel like myself, which sounds strange- but I have struggled with myself for a long long time. Thank you for being exactly who you are and for loving me for exactly who I am. I can't believe how fortunate I am to have you for the rest of my life. Things may not always be easy, but it will be easier because you and I are together. I love that the words "I love you" just don't seem to be enough anymore, and that you say the meaning of love grows with our understanding of it and each other. That being said, I love you, and God-willing, I will be by your side for the rest of our lives.
Love,
Katie Rose
Monday, January 28, 2013
Sunday, January 27, 2013
put my eyes ahead of me
I have been sick a lot lately. It's not only flu season, but I've been battling a sinus infection for months. MONTHS. Sigh. It sure is sucking the life out of me and making it difficult for me to do a lot of the wedding stuff I would like to do. And it makes hanging out with my friends less possible, which stinks.
I have been very distracted by my physical health lately. It makes me feel very self-centered. I haven't been thinking much about other people. I haven't been praying much. I haven't been doing a lot of the things that add joy to my life. I have lost my zip and my excitement for life.
I went to church this morning though and I was briefly reminded that my life is very good, and that at one time not so long ago, it was very not good. Though I may be fighting this stupid sinus infection and feeling lousy most of the time, I am free. I am on the other side of bondage. After twenty-three years of darkness, I am finally out of the tunnel. That is reason to celebrate for literally the rest of my life. And while there is celebration, there is also the reminder that I once knew agony. It feels good to reflect now that I was not pretending my pain. The misery was real, inexhaustibly real. And now, the freedom is just as real. I could barely hope then that it would be this real- that joy could be as real as sorrow.
Put my eyes ahead of me, with only a glance behind. Put my heart about me, with just a few others within me. Pull my arms from around me, that I may grasp others warmly. Step my feet lightly, that I may not stomp anyone else down. Bring from my lips gentle words issued from a clear mind and forgiving heart, lest I burden someone else by judgment and grudges. Let my spirit offer peace and faith as the answer to my questions and worries, that I may live in the contentment and confidence provided graciously by my Father.
I have been very distracted by my physical health lately. It makes me feel very self-centered. I haven't been thinking much about other people. I haven't been praying much. I haven't been doing a lot of the things that add joy to my life. I have lost my zip and my excitement for life.
I went to church this morning though and I was briefly reminded that my life is very good, and that at one time not so long ago, it was very not good. Though I may be fighting this stupid sinus infection and feeling lousy most of the time, I am free. I am on the other side of bondage. After twenty-three years of darkness, I am finally out of the tunnel. That is reason to celebrate for literally the rest of my life. And while there is celebration, there is also the reminder that I once knew agony. It feels good to reflect now that I was not pretending my pain. The misery was real, inexhaustibly real. And now, the freedom is just as real. I could barely hope then that it would be this real- that joy could be as real as sorrow.
Put my eyes ahead of me, with only a glance behind. Put my heart about me, with just a few others within me. Pull my arms from around me, that I may grasp others warmly. Step my feet lightly, that I may not stomp anyone else down. Bring from my lips gentle words issued from a clear mind and forgiving heart, lest I burden someone else by judgment and grudges. Let my spirit offer peace and faith as the answer to my questions and worries, that I may live in the contentment and confidence provided graciously by my Father.
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